He said it to me as he looked me lovingly, purely in the eyes… I took a breath and exhaled the disbelief and inhaled the pure love it was said in. Snapshot that moment, and it hit me – I could rest, I could BE, I could just … And that, whatever it was – whatever I was and am is enough.
All of a sudden all the once trite Bible verses made sense – “This is my servant in whom I am well pleased”. RECEIVED – he loves me just the way I am, RECEIVED – “Not by works but by the blood you are saved” – RECEIVED… It sat in my heart like an old welcome friend realized.
Pinterest tells me I am not enough, that I am a mom fail; the book store tells me I am a terrible writer and certainly not unique; media tells me I have the wrong body, flat hair, am “lacking bedroom skills”. According to the latest Cosmo … I’m not enough.
But, Rob Saito stood in front of me, not breaking eye contact telling me I was enough….
Ohhh, but how powerful am I when I realize I AM 🙌
I have likened this last season to swimming and not being able to get my head above water to just catch a breath. It’s nothing or anything specifically, just everything in general is spinning. I fumble for the shore, for the side of the pool, and sometimes it’s just not there for me, so there are things that I try to remember to do, like listen to uplifting music or meditate, or swim, or go for a run, or spend quality time with the family, or be extra mindful, or work out, or…_____ (fill in the blank).
When nothing else is working, I call in the resources. I am learning to do this sooner rather than later in these seasons, and THIS season I needed coaches, doctors, my supportive husband, chiropractors, massage therapists, food plans, accountability partners; I needed trainers, I needed friends, I needed all of it…….. AAAALLLL of it!!! I also needed my clients, the people whom I inspire, the people whom I help, helped me more than they could ever know💜
Beyond uplifting music, I do things that some people might find funny. I Google “Veggie Tales” sound tracks. My kids grew up on “Veggie Tales”, and the cartoon makes me laugh my A$$ off! There are some GOLD moments that Larry and Bob commemorate with music; the Rumor Weed and the loss of a hairbrush are two of my go too’s. I dramatically sing Disney songs in my kitchen and actually choreograph music videos to them in my shower when I’m alone (I realize this may be crazy to you – but it keeps me sane). I remember funny, embarrassing moments that made me giggle to myself. As I dug around in the archives of my memory I thought back to the last time I made a decision to go on a fitness journey.
In a galaxy far away (3 years ago) I was doing Spartan training. I was excited to have my husband along for the ride; it was something that we chose to do together for a season. My only problem that I had was NOT the ridiculous amounts of burpees or sprints or weights or dynamic training, but (as I’m sure every single woman can understand) The. Skipping. Every. Single. Time. My weak pelvic floor betrayed me! I would POISE out, but still felt so embarrassed and old beyond my years. I would skip for two seconds and run to the bathroom. And, nothing. So, in my wisdom I decided that if skipping made me pee, then I should skip hovering over the toilet… I was in a private place, no problem. So, leg on either side of this porcelain obstacle, I jumped. As I jumped I heard this ticking sound that I couldn’t place. I stopped and looked around. “Am I breaking the toilet?” Nothing. I jumped again, heard it again, *looonnng pause*, JUMPED super hard, *peed a little*, then this wave of knowing descended on me … my A$$ was slapping against itself making that “ticking” noise –😳 for a brief moment I sat in shame 😢. A bijillion thoughts and negative self-talk flowed. Then, without conscious thought, I flipped it. What I mean by that is I recognized the positive intention that I could see this in; MY A$$ was APPLAUDING my decision to get healthy, and, in fact, cheering me on for the determination to “jump P out” so I could skip better 😜. Of course I sat and giggled at the entire situation – and then I thanked my A$$ for the encouragement.
My point in sharing this is:
First, to make you smile a little (and I hope you can actually laugh WITH me and not AT me),
and second, to be able to “Flip” those seemingly negative moments. I could have chosen to sit in shame and self-depreciating thoughts. And to be honest, I CAN choose to sit in that daily or even moment to moment …
There are so many moments that come and we have a choice – We can hear the discouragements talking about how far we have to go, or how much ground we have lost – or we can listen for the applause to keep going – and realize how far we have come.
YOU in this moment are perfectly placed. You are LOVED just the way you are – YOU are enough.
And when you say that to yourself (after you go directly to your mirror… right now, go …)
RECEIVE that statement into yourself.
I invite you (as Rob invited me) to say “Thank you I see myself as that”
I Applaud you 😉
Just my thoughts from here